Truth in Advertising

It strikes me as funny that commercials for medications are required to tell you the side effects and they do it so cheerfully that you hardly even catch it. "Hey guys, if Cialis gives you an erection lasting more than 4 hours, call your doctor." (Cue the happy music.) So my question is, why doesn't everything else come with the same truth in advertising? I would love to see a commercial that says, "This toothpaste works, but we have to tell you that it tastes like crap." Or "We want you to use this shampoo because we will make tons of money. However, your hair will frizz and you will look like the love child of Tina Turner and Richard Simmons." Why not? Wouldn't you rather know before you spend your hard-earned money? Besides, we all know that there are plenty of people out there who WANT that look. So I think I should start my own television channel with real-life advertising by unpaid common folk who actually use the stuff and have an opinion that isn't geared toward making them tons of money. We can start with coffee. The dialogue could be something like this: "I woke up this morning with Folgers in my cup. However, the rich and smooth flavor they promise is a farce and I about gagged on the crap." Or, "Maxwell House...good to the last drop? Not a chance! That is the last drop I will ever drink!" Or how about, "McDonalds...I'm not lovin' it! It's making me fat and if I eat one more dollar burger I may gag!" Or, "Alka Seltzer...plop, plop, fizz, fizz...oh how disgusting this stuff really is!" Or, "Yo quiero Taco Bell.... Yo also quiero heartburn at 3am and the runs for 4 days!" Or, "A T & T, Reach out and touch someone. The hell with that, it is easier to whip your cell phone at their head. Go with U. S. Cellular but make sure you insure your phone."

I just think the world needs a little more honesty...