Final Wishes

Ok, so maybe I have death on my mind a little these days. One might judge that by my bucket list on yesterday's post and then today's topic of final wishes. I guess maybe I do. In the last month, my beloved cat, Ozzie lost his battle with diabetes. He was almost 10 years old. Then, my cat, Clint, passed away. And this morning, my beautiful black persian, Tucker (not to be confused with my dog, Tucker) passed away in my arms. He was 12. And in the midst of all this, my friend Deb lost her golden retriever, Kasey, and my friend Dawn lost her yellow lab, Ranger. Animal deaths...not human deaths...but painful deaths nonetheless. I have officially declared that I have discovered the single greatest drawback to having animals. We outlive our children. So this got me thinking...

When one of my animals dies, I have them cremated and placed in an urn. But, when I die, who is going to want the ashes of my animals? What will become of them? I have no direct heirs. I have no one who fully understands the love I carry for them and always will, for all the days of my life. So I decided that these are my final wishes...

When I die, I want to be cremated and I want my ashes mixed thoroughly with all of the ashes of my animals. Then, I want a handful of the ashes set aside. The majority of the ashes should be scattered off the Wisconsin River Bridge on a nice, windy day. The remaining handful should be casually (so as not to draw attention) scattered over the ivy wall at Wrigley Field. I am depending on my nieces, Nikayla and Jaime, to do this for me. So, Nik and Jaime, put a handful of your crazy Aunt Heidi in your pocket and get bleacher seats for the game. I don't care who the opposing team is so don't worry about that. I also don't care which one of you does this. Have a soda and then transfer me to the empty cup. During the 7th inning stretch, right when they sing "Root root root for the Cubbies..." stretch your arm, with the cup in your hand, over the edge of the wall and let me fall over the ivy. Be aware of where the tv cameras are at all times. If security sees you, run like hell, but don't drop the cup. It's evidence you don't want to leave behind.

If by chance you cannot get permission to toss most of me off the Wisconsin River Bridge, please mix my ashes into a litter box. It seems most appropriate...